*Note: This post may contain affiliate links. Read my disclosure policy here.
Have you ever had a moment when you pick up a book and then think that you could have written the exact same book? Or at least something really similar? Well, (affiliate link) Loving My Actual Life is the book for me. Alexandra Kuykendall, a mom to four girls, started an experiment of sorts. She worked through different areas in her life each month for nine months, to see what kind of a difference it would make to her and her family if she really pressed on in implementing some plans, organization, or hope into her days. At the end of each chapter, Alexandra shares the practices she will continue in her home, as well as some questions for reflection. So it is similar to what I am doing with this site! We’ll be looking at a different life area, and while not ignoring the other areas, we’ll be really trying to figure out what “next step(s)” we can take to embrace and overcome some challenges of motherhood.
I’ll be sharing my reflections on this book through the month as we “Start” 2017. Months 1 and 2 of her experiment are focused on “Quiet” and “Mornings”.
“Quiet” and “mornings” are two things I had taken for granted before kiddos showed up at the scene. I love my girls, but they are chatterboxes, and they also typically do not sleep in. (I mean, it’s all subjective and relative and all of that, right? I do know kids who wake up earlier than mine. But still.) I’m a true introvert (possibly borderline ambivert) who takes a long time to process and analyze all the things, so I need my quiet to recuperate from life. And mornings, well, when I start the day after my family is up already, I feel like defeated and like I am already behind. I’m so glad HelloMornings entered my life 7 years ago, but I’m still a work-in-progress.
I’m using the “Questions for Reflection” at the end of the chapters to reflect 😉 but I’m share more in bullet point form otherwise I am a pretty wordy mama.
Month 1: Quiet
– I need a good amount of quiet (literal and virtual) in my typical day, and I don’t think I get quite enough, especially on long days with lots of interactions (who knew that homeschoolers are not home very often!?!). I think I will have to plug it into my schedule so I get that time to recover from the “noise”.
– The challenge with implementing quiet is my family (I don’t think any of them are true introverts…maybe another post for another day) and my inability to say no to opportunities to serve and connect (FOMO and “if I don’t do it, there’s no one else” which is sometimes my own thinking and other times this is what I’m told).
– Increasing silence has always impacted how I experience God. It helps me reflect on how it’s not always about me. The world is a much bigger place than that, and we are all created for more than we purpose for ourselves.
Some quotable quotes:
Whether with an entire day, or periods of time set aside every day, your soul needs rest…[t]hat kind of miracle doesn’t just happen on its own.*
Sometimes for quiet to be prioritized, it must be schedule.
So as I cherish the quiet, I must learn to cherish the noise because I cherish from whom it stems.
And I thought of Jesus. Who had to retreat from the people he did life with, his disciples, to have some quiet…he set himself apart…prayer is his replenishment. Not Instagram, the mindless TV, YouTube. It was speaking and listening to God.
I don’t have to allow life to just happen, I can make some intentional decisions with the end in mind.
Month 2: Mornings
– I am a “the day’s a wasting” kinda person when it comes to the morning. I think everyone else is a “easer inner” in this house. I’m also an “all-or-nothing” / “now-or-never” kinda person, so this becomes problematic when I get a slow start. Implementing systems and routines has been super helpful…when the systems and routines are followed. :p
– Three things I could try tomorrow morning to help me have a more peaceful household is to model completing my own tasks in a more calm manner, which makes everyone else more calm.
– Believing God’s compassion and mercies are created new every morning helps me to live out my life in more comfort and peace, knowing that He has control even when I don’t or that the world seems out-of-control.
Some quotable quotes:
Here’s the truth: mornings set the tone for the day.
I know myself well enough to know I will never – I repeat, never – hit perfection in the housekeeping realm, but I can have a bit of forethought as I start each morning.
Some mornings I have it all planned out and then a wrench gets thrown in.
Better to rest in him from the start than to run without him all day long.
His love and mercies are created new every morning. Whether it’s in my morning routine or my need for forgiveness, every morning offers new hope for me…He offers new love. Every morning. He offers a new start. Every morning.
Your turn: Have you added some quiet into your daily schedule and/or implemented a morning routine? If so, how has it help in embracing and/or overcoming the challenges of motherhood?
*Part of the quote is an excerpt from (affiliate link) Soul Keeping: Caring for the Most Important Part of You by John Ortberg.
P.S. Next week I will be reading Months 3-5 on the topics of Dates, Health, and Adventures.
P.S.S. You can check out My 2017 Book List (specifically curated for the Work-in-Progress Mom) and read along with me this year.
*Note: This post may contain affiliate links, which means I’ll receive a tiny percentage if you make a purchase through my link at no extra cost to you. Read my disclosure policy here.